Saturday, October 27, 2007

What am I left with... what do I leave you with?

In the end I conclude, I don’t think I’ll get onto second life after this project. It was fun, no doubt, but beyond a point, second life is pretty depressing and pointless. There isn’t much to do and most of second life is about sex that it might as well be called sex life!
:)
I think my biggest problem with second life is that it is trying to be real life. I find it so funny that in a world, where you can fly, and get rid of a system of consumption and money, we’d come right back to it. It becomes a place where you live out fantasies of being what you can’t in the real world. Second life gives you a sense of power and control because it mimics reality… only it is not reality. I found that in Second life you are faced with the same issues as those in real life. For example, popularity, money, having a group of friends, someone to love, getting a job, owning a large house, a cool car... An important thing to note is that there is no real consequence. It’s a safe place to be. Unlike the real world where your actions have consequences, in second life you can get away with being rude, ignoring people, being someone you’re not, looking like anything you want. I think the behavior of people and the space really says something about human beings. We’re a type of being that is so aware of itself that it spends hours indulging in itself. Seems to me there is something inherently human, a nature a want and desire to be stronger or more powerful or more in control. It is funny how when we’re given the choice of a new world, we’d just repeat ourselves with old systems and values. If you think about it the real world provides us with examples of what is happening in second life. It’s a two way street. Plastic surgery to get the nose you want, liposuction to lose weight, spending hours shopping, changing your hair color to changing your skin color…. its all happening.
Given the choice between the two worlds I’d choose real life any day because I value uncertainty and I value death. If aspects like age, growing old, dirt and struggle go missing, life isn’t really worth living, not to me at least.

The Edit... adding and subtracting...

I started editing little encounters and conversations. I felt however, that they were very disjointed. There were no transitions in between scenes, and no real story carrying the film through. I began to panic and decided to write a structured fiction story based on my experiences. I wrote out a sequence of events that showed the progression of my character Spray as she immerses herself in the world of Second Life. This however, over time I realized wasn’t working either. This is because Spray now started to seem like some artificial intelligence that had a life of her own independent of me, the player behind the screen. This wasn’t feeling right and I sat down and looked at the way the earlier edits were working and translating my experience in second life vs. the new version. A combination of the two seemed to work. I re-structured the narrative and began a new edit.

I realized that on one hand I was trying to depict a honest representation of my experience. On the other hand I was trying to translate a larger phenomenon, a state of being, and its possible repercussions. How to do both I was finding difficult, however, have managed to some extent I think.
On another note, a huge obstacle I had to tackle was sound. None of my second life footage had sound because the program I used to grab footage did not record sound! So with a silent film, a meticulous searching for sound, and sound effects began. The image transformed on the edit with music and sound added to it. For example the sound of the keyboard while someone is typing. Or the sound of the sea and the waves in a location by the sea.

I also tried a series of tests merging different types of imagery. For one I tried using real life footage with second life footage. I wanted to see what would happen if I used real eyes merged with the face of my second life character. The results made the avatar look spooky in a nice way. I also used footage of myself from when I was a child, embedded into a television in second life. Spray watching T.V sees her past in the screen and seems to get sad. The results were quite powerful and emotional.

Over time I began to feel like the film still lacked something. I felt it was the lack of a real world local context. Somewhere the player, the real world Nupur had to come out. For an audience one would wonder, who is this avatar? Where is this girl coming from? I thought inter-cutting between my real world self and second life self would result in a more holistic representation. Another reason for my making this decision was that there were moments I reflected upon second life that I wanted to include in the film but could not show through second life. I decided to script out little sequences I would cut to between second life scenes. I felt that I wasn’t talking about second life as such but a larger phenomenom of connectivity, social networking and communication. Included in this is also your mobile phone, your email, facebook, and numerous other ‘avatars’ one has.

The style of this filming I decided would be seemingly non-fiction, as if its really happening, only its structured. I think my inspiration for this comes from the popular ‘webisode’ Lonelygirl15, aired on Youtube. Lonelygirl15 is the result of a new dimension of reality T.V or ‘non-fiction,’ that is not real, rather it is a construct that takes great effort to appear as if real.

Sunday, September 23, 2007

To those that are reading this...

Well I haven't posted anything in a while... that's because I'm editing at the moment... Staying away from Second life for a little while...

Right now I'm trying to analyze my journey... find out where I got sucked in... into the illusion, and trying to figure out how and why I did.

Some people think I crossed over to the 'other' side... I don't think I have.

And someone asked me if i'd stick around in SL after this project... my answer to that...
real life to me is far far more enticing. Why? Because you can't have everything you want.

BUT I don't know for sure yet. I think I might stick around. 20 % for Entertainment and 80% to study it I think.

For now, although I have a lot to say, I don't want to just yet...

I'll leave this with an account of two recent incidents however...

I happened to teleport to a random location I typed in my search engine... it was a beachy place... (Sandbox they call it... a place where people come to build things that they can eventually sell in SL)... anyway I was there and (didn't realize it was a building zone) took out my car (by the way I have many now) and thought I'd run people over.
I just wanted to see what would happen, how people would react etc... I drove around like a maniac trying to hit as many as I could and people actually started running away from me... one girl ran into the water to save herself.



Now the funniest thing is that you CANNOT get hurt... not a scratch, forget feeling pain. But people run and you know what else... they get very pissed off.
I got reported for abuse. ;)

After that I was flying around trying to look for the guy (I knew his name but didn't know what he looked like...) that reported me to see if he was anywhere in the vicinty... I was randomly clicking on people to see if I could find him. While I was doing that the most incredible thing happened... I clicked on this one guy... and it turned out to be Daffton Collins... the guy from the, 'Chance Meeting,' video... the one I followed randomly earlier and befriended!!!
It's crazy because the chances of bumping into someone again in Second Life is like one in a million, and that too is putting it mildly.





INSANE!

Heh heh ok signing off now ... the edit table is braying... (it hasn't yet begun to sing.)

Wednesday, September 12, 2007

I've been..........

I think i'm getting used to being on SL...
and unlike before where I would point out little details about the game, I think somewhere I'm not even seeing them anymore...

I must say though I do feel strange time and again...
Over the last week I have befriended two three people that I have really connected with.
And lying by a pool, or amidst trees near the sea, I really do feel like I'm closer to them... even though I have no idea what they must really look like or sound like etc.

Recently I have acquired a ton of clothes, costumes, underwear and skin! (nipples too... heh heh)
And I'm starting to enjoy dressing myself up... wearing black lace underwear is cool (on SL!)
But for the most part, its about making my appearance look the way I want others to see me as. And yesterday I was told I looked sexy. (yay!)

The other day I saw a couple making out in a car, and this was the first time in SL that I had seen any public display of affection (I think it has to do with the places I was visiting too...) Anyhow I decided to film this, I took a few shots, feeling a little voyeuristic and wrong but did it all the same... then I decided I'll put myself in the frame and laugh or smile or something while they make out because they looked really funny...
So I sat myself down next to the car and looked up at them at started to laugh... suddenly I get a message from the guy in the car (funnily enough it had to be the guy) saying, "yes... can I help you." I was jolted out of my little fun game of laughing and filming and suddenly felt very wrong to be sitting there... but then I told him what I was doing, and that I was student... Both him and the woman began to laugh and said "yea yea go ahead you can film this."
There were a few shots though that I couldn't take on my own... so I phoned Arun, both faculty and friend to join me there and shoot it from his laptop at home...
When Arun showed up his avatar had the same glitch that Trisham's had earlier, where he's dancing everywhere and can't stop!!!
So the girl in the car sees this and says are you guys making a Bollywood film here! HaHaHa!
It ended up being quite fun and strange too, to direct online and get the shots I wanted. And in the end, the two perfect strangers (two perfectly strange avatars even) in the car, have now become real people to me, and I might even be able to call them friends.



THEN!!!....yesterday I had sex on SL! That was a truly outrageous and funny situation... There are people everywhere, doing it with the next person that comes along... the prescripted animations are so mechanical and the face has no expression unless you give it one...
and there is actually no control... you do whatever the script has in store for you. Bodies don't even meet, people kiss without their lips even connecting and it is really really funny to look at!
There was something that got to me though.... in that room full of 'good looking people,' there was this one guy, who was big and fat and hairy (he had nipple piercings too) anyhow... the thing was that nobody wanted to do him! And in SL a space where you can look like anything you want to, he chose to look like that... and he was just walking around the room, looking at people and every once in a while he had this strange smile on his face...
I think now I should have spoken to him... but at the same time it's nice not knowing...







All these things I've been talking about I filmed and will use for the final film... I don't know if I want to put up the footage as of right now so I don't ruin the effect of the finished film...
But I've been wonderin... what kind of rights issues will I face? Filming people without their consent... I wonder if they'll get angry and have a problem with it...! If anyone knows about the legalities of non-fiction filming in Second Life... please let me know!

Ok well... back to work for now...

Anyhow... I will be putting up some more video tests perhaps, to get some feedback with technique from my invisible crew that's out there somewhere!

Saturday, September 8, 2007

A Chance Meeting... another attempt at filming

Well...
in the past I've shot fiction films and non-fiction films... but shooting a non-fiction sequence in SL is a whole other ball game.
In terms of my project its especially hard because the conversation, the connection with the people I meet and being true to myself is extremely important. But when I am talking to someone I also have to keep typing...
while I'm doing that I'm also filming because who knows... it might go somewhere, and might be an effective piece in the film...
so one is thinking of shots, the timeline, the edit etc all at the same time.
The other issue is shooting oneself, using the mouse, keyboard etc... and then animating oneself in that shot as well...
so the planning has to be even better...

Anyhow what I have here is a little something... It is part of a conversation with a man (now a friend) I randomly met and spoke with for a long period of time. Actually I followed him... I saw this person flying in the sky and said to myself... hmmm let's follow him... It was like those films where you follow someone, then they catch on, and turn around and you look the other way. SL being a 3D environment... actually had me doing that! But it is not real life, and people can't be all that bothered if they are being followed... and what started off as a sleazy sleuth type thing , turned into quite an enriching conversation!
I am hoping that he will choose to be a part of this project because I found that some of the things we were thinking and talking about were very similar.









To watch the video click on the link:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=N36qBtvv5Vs

I will upload soon the next part of this conversation once I edit it....
I will like to play with sound, voice and music also.... that I think is the next step in terms of the medium.

Friday, September 7, 2007

A funny incident...

I went online the other day and met a friend from my real life...
we thought we'd walk around, explore, try out stuff to help with the project...
what ended up happening, although a technical glitch... turned out to be quite funny...

to watch check it out...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EaRIAvnrsVw






Friday, August 31, 2007

More attempts at filming....

Ok so I finally got over some technical issues, getting the right machine blah blah...
and tried some filming again.
The first video is a very short stupid event less situation of me in an underwater world. Here I was still shooting using the keyboard as my camera functions.... Interesting thing in this water world place was that their were tidbits about the environment (real world environmental issues) that people can read and engage with. It's like a very cool looking 3D presentation about issues that people don't really want to listen to but they might just here...hmmm...
here's a picture of me....




Here is the link to the video:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LiCFPJbPlQU

For the second one I started messing around with using the mouse rather than the keyboard for camera. The movements one can get are a lot smoother and controlled. I decided to try filming something and entered this space called Club Close Up. I noticed many people sitting around alone and some people dancing. No one was responding to me however when I spoke to them. Turned out that the owner of the club pays people to just have their avatars sitting around so his club looks busy. This I discovered after a woman returned to her keyboard and we talked, about her, second life as well as my project. Turns out that even she wants to make a film in second life. Anyway everyone there was just there making money...away from their keyboard!! Which is called camping...and it turns out is a very common phenomenon.

This video is for those who don’t know what second life looks like. People pay a lot of attention to the way they look and some avatars are extremely detailed...and earlier when I spoke about identity, crafting and indulging in oneself... one can see here what I mean.

I ended up talking to a few people there…one conversation was with a Hispanic hot looking avatar with huge boobs. I told her what I was attempting and she said she would act in SL. I asked her to 'act,' both in her second life and her real life but then she said no no... I want to remain anonymous. It turned out that she was 41 years old and didn't want to reveal her real self on camera. It was only natural I thought for her to create an avatar that looked 20 years younger. :)

[The Spanish chick/woman is the one sitting on a beanbag hovering in the sky... a man's arms are wrapped around her...]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PZ3OYx_Wf5c

AAAAAAAAAANNNNNND edits of conversations will be coming up..... so keep checking. ;)